Tuesday 23 March 2010
Sunday 21 March 2010
small town blues
Living in a small has horrific implications once you leave that small town inasmuch that when you return, be it for a day or a month you can't help but notice how hopelessly, horribly, absolutely tiny the place is.
I'm staying at my parents for a month, this is the first day and I'm completely bored out of my skull, but it is not just simple boredom - it is a crushing, depressing feeling. I know that in 30 days or less I'll be back with my friends at our own places but right now that seems a world away. Where I am now I can't call someone at 3am to hang out if I'm bored, I can't just go for a walk around and see what's going on. No one lives here anymore; my friends have either gone for good or have no intention of dropping by for a few weeks of monotony.
Couple this feeling of home-town dread with the fact that about 2 months ago I realised that one of my friends might possibly be one of my favourite people I ever met and if there's anyone I wanted to be here right now it would be her. I realised this with full knowledge that she would be taking a trip to America to see a guy that she dated last term and was really close to. Now I'm fucking dying because I can't talk to her for weeks and have no idea what she's going to say when she gets back.
In all honesty I can't blame the entirety of this feeling on being in a small town, perhaps I was skirting around the problem a little.
In short; she's gone, and so am I from anything that would make it easier.
April, I implore you to get here as quick as you can
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